What happens when we cut away the labels and all that extra “stuff” that seems to endlessly fill up our minds and being? What happens when we present our true self to the world, vulnerable to criticism and judgment? What if we simply observe what is going on around us rather than pass judgement? This year I am interested in finding the peace the comes with accepting who I am for who I truly am. As hard as this sounds, I am willing and able to literally rip away what is holding me back and go forth speaking my truth, no matter who is, or isn’t, listening. While this may sound a little out there, I am determined to find out what my purpose is. Along the way, I want to spend more time practicing self care and compassion, despite how hard I have found it is to put myself first. So many people have told me that you are unable to fully love anyone else unless you first love yourself. The more I think about it, I understand the reasoning behind this, though I know it will be hard to implement. It’s hard to break away from that feeling of being “egotistical”, the black and white belief that you are either selfless or selfish. Seeing and believing in the grey is what I need to work on.  How to arrive at this belief will be the hard part and to practice it on a daily basis will be a whole other obstacle.

I decided to start working on a painting a series of 10×10″ moths that all carry the same message…coming closer to light, unpeeling layers to get to the core. Finding the balance between hovering between the rational/intellectual side of my being and emotional/spiritual side. Connecting these two separate halves and merging their completely different ideas together is a huge undertaking. I am hoping as I move through each day I can begin to collect experiences that help guide me in the right direction.